The Reason For The Name

My readers (all 2 of you), you are probably wondering why I use the alias King of Ferrets.

I give you... the reason for the name!



He's a cute little guy named Jerry. Beware, for he may eat your computer mouse and then spill any nearby cups of water onto your computer.

Of course, I have other pets, but Emperor of Dogs or Czar of Cats don't exactly have the same ring to them.


Let's see the pet behind Door #2!



This little dachshund is called Charlie. His sole purpose in life is to get the squeakers out of squeaky dog toys.

The second of my two dogs!



This fat little half Jack Russel half toy fox terrier follow my mom around everywhere. She's completely fucking insane. If she was a cat, she would be by the picture in the dictionary for the phrase scaredy cat. If you give her a Milk Bone after the first of the day, she must bury it in the sheets of my mom's bed for about 30 seconds and then eat it. If there's a thunderstorm, she won't eat anything. If she sees someone she doesn't know, she hides behind my mom and barks until he/she/it goes away.

Now for the cats!



This is the only picture I have of Roselinda, aka Lindy. She sleeps, and meows anytime anyone gets close to the pantry because she wants cat treats. Occasionally, she will sit outside under a bush and pretend she's a real cat instead of an extremely large cat-like thing whose only use in life is to be petted. If you feel her belly, you will notice that despite it seeming like just a bunch of fur, it's all fat. Her redeeming virtue is extremely soft and silky fur.

The second cat is similarly overweight.



This lovely specimen is known as Whiskers. Like Lindy, she sleeps a lot and is extremely overweight. Unlike Lindy, she actually does go outside besides sitting in the backyard every once in a while.

The last cat I don't have a picture of. Her name is Twilight, and she has bluish-gray fur with small patches of peach on her jaw and chest. She is thin, fit, and active. In short, she actually acts like a cat that isn't Garfield. I think that this is because she is a short-furred cat instead of a long-furred one. Her activities including eating small animals, bringing small animals into the house (I have no idea how she got a bird twice the size of her head all the way up the stairs without breaking herself or it), sitting in my sister's room, and wandering around outside doing FSM-knows-what.

Living in this house, I have learned to never ever sit down on anything if you want to have clothes that are free of fur. Also that pets are awesome. But mostly not to sit down on things.