Kawase Takara Foot Patches: Part 2

Kawase Takara has returned! Time to check out the next 2 parts of the site, since the Authenticity and Dr. Itsuko sections are kinda short:

How can you tell it's authentic? This handy section tells you!

Many claim they are Kawase Takara™ using a different name. This is not true. This is how you can tell if you are getting the authentic Kawase Takara™:

* The Name
o Kawase Takara™ is sold under two names only
+ Sanphan Fushigi Sheet (in Japan)
+ Kawase Takara™ (outside of Japan)

Because, yknow, people always believe you when you claim to be selling a specific product and it's under a completely different name.

The Ingredients

* Compare our Ingredients List with others
o Kawase Takara™ contains 50% wood vinegar comprised of three different wood vinegars
+ Oak, Beech and Sukura
o Kawase Takara™ contains higher amounts of negative ions than most patches, while staying within the optimum benefit range of negative ion counts.

How the hell do "wood vinegar" (whatever the hell that is) and negative ions help draw out toxins?

o Kawase Takara™ uses the particular combination of immune boosters that Dr. Kawase Itsuko believed to be the most effective.

Because your immune boosters don't need testing when you believe in them!

The Manufacturer

* Kawase Takara™ is manufactured at the Hanakobosanphan Co. in Japan in a sterile environment, which increases the effectiveness of the negative ions.

What effect do they have that gets increased again? Guess we'll learn that in the Negative Ions section later.

# The Patent

* Kawase Takara™ is the only foot patch that is patented in both the US and Japan
* No. US6,420,624, dated 16th July 2002.

And this is extremely important, because patents prove it works! Really! I'm totally cereal, guys!

Ooo, a biography of the creator next? Wait, no, its just saying that it works and appealing to authority a bit by saying she's a "sensei".

Dr. Kawase Itsuko
Unmasking The Secret Of Health Between Trees And Human Beings

I think that trees and humans, since they belong to different fucking kingdoms, probably have radically different biology so any secret of health that works on one probably won't work on the other, but what do I know? I'm not a sensei or a "doctor" (even though it doesn't say she even has a degree, much less a PhD or MD), just a random 15 year old and a mean old skeptic.

Twenty Six years ago, Dr. Kawase Itsuko, the founder of the "Kawase Takara™", hypothesized that if trees could grow for ages without any aid, humans too should be able to live longer -- if they could discover and harness the secrets behind the growth of trees. A Sensei in Japan, Dr. Kawase Itsuko combined the application of certain eastern medical theories with western medical technological skills to gain an unprecedented result in the discovery that the resinous substance or wood vinegar of some trees actually possesses detoxifying functions. She also discovered that the great absorbing power of the wood vinegar makes it fit to be used as a physiotherapeutic cure, as well as for the easing of pains and swells.

1) Should I really trust a medical product from someone who doesn't know how to spell out numbers, something I've had pounded into my head for years?
2) Why would humans be able to live as long as trees? As I've stated, different kingdoms dammit!
3) Doesn't "sensei" just mean "teacher"? And if so, why is it capitalized?
4) Why do people who like "Eastern" medicine often demonize "Western" medicine if they can be combined to create panacea?
5) Why would a substance created by trees to "dextoxify" themselves work on all toxins found in humans, since substances toxic to humans aren't necessarily toxic to trees and vice versa?
6) How would absorption cure swells and pains? Can you absorb a headache?

The Doctor's invention has been patented in both Japan and the United States of America. The Department of Patent Rights in Japan issued patent certificate No. 3195318 and in the United States of America, the product was issued Patent Certificate No. US6,420,624, dated 16th July 2002.

Wonder Twin Powers, activate! Form of: Appeal to authority of patents!

The Kabushiki-Kai-sha established by Dr. Kawase Itsuko is located in Mount Fuji. She has appointed her eldest son, Akira Kawase to be in charge of this business. As successor to his mother's business, Akira Kawase has been working hard to improve the quality of the product. With more that 10 years of experience in products from Kabushiki-Kai-sha, business is booming.

My only question about this is: What the hell is a Kabushiki-Kai-sha?

Commendations:

Awarded The Best In Japan, Dr. Kawase Itsuko's invention has benefited the world. Her effort not only shook up the Japanese medical circle but she was awarded the Best Invention and New Technology, by the son-in-law of the Japanese Emperor. This award is in recognition of her creative and scientific contribution to mankind and is the highest award in Japan. She has been recognized as the pioneer producer of foot care sheets in Japan.

The Japanese Higashikuninomiya Commemorative prize was awarded to Dr. Kawase Itsuko for her distinguished service, such as the research and development of the foot patch over the years.

Dr. Kawase Itsuko was also chosen as a member of the Japan Academy in 2001.

Yay, more appeals to authority! Woos can never seem to get enough of them.

Up next: The ingredients of the foot patch!

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Paranormal State: WTF is this shit?

I found Paranormal State on my DVR, so I just randomly started watching it because I'd watched everything else. I'm gonna blog as I watch it.

All I have to say so far is: This is a massive pile of shit.
Their "investigation" is just asking people "hey, whats the haunting doing/what did it do?" and finding out that some people were murdered a long long time ago and were buried nearby. From what I can tell, they haven't even confirmed it actually happened in that house; it might just be them being stupid and not mentioning it, though. The presumably main character is saying he's been having a dream with the name of a demon in it, and he says he isn't sure if its related to the "case".

--1st Commercial Break--(Dude, they're starting up a fucking psychic kids show? wtf?)

Little appeal to authority; he says he got hired by the Roman Catholic Church. Now he's saying that he isn't allowed to say it or it will cause a confrontation. They're bringing in a medium. He says that the cemetary is connected to this shit, and that the house is sad, and there's a male spirit. Also, one of the residents supposedly is drawing it all in. Apparently, there's at least 1 human spirit and one possibly demonic spirit, and said demonic spirit is amused by our paranormal detective. Now they're saying they'll do "dead time," where they let it communicate. The jackass is kinda self centered; he thinks that it might be a spirit which is after him and him alone, even though there was no guarantee he would ever come to that house. Now they're doing the dead time shit, mostly involves praying. Trying to talk to ghosts, no response from the "little girl ghost" thats around. Discussing summoning male ghost that may or may not be human. Magic opening and closing door effect. Creepy sound as they summon the "male spirit", feel like he's near them. Now touching them. Now creepy flashes and red letters that I can't see. Medium writes something down, our friendly neighborhood idiot claims to know the name he wrote down and that it's a demon.

--2nd commercial break--(More upcoming psychic kid series shit. Why encourage a kid's delusion of grandeur if they actually apply to real life instead of just fantasy?)

Same name as the one in the kids head. They're worried about danger and shit so they send a couple girls home who came with them. Some weird crap which I think is supposed to be something about inner conflict, but with genuinely horrid acting. They bring in a "demonologist" famous for the Amityville Horror case (from what I can tell this means that it's entirely possible what she's famous for is made up, based on skimming through the criticisms) to help with the house and help figure out whats going on with him, another stupid way of trying to give the guy depth. Describes incident of name-getting, she recognizes name apparently. Demonologist says theres anger and sorrow. Poor attempt at humor: "somebody needs anger management" because of all the anger. Description of real life plight of people in house. Screwed up father figure situation for little boy apparently, due to at one point getting a foster father and also having his biological father leave him twice. Demonologist invokes "Law" of Attraction as a description. Call to Catholic priest, going to bless home and help people in house. "Interim house blessing" by idiots, stuff about demon haunting him. Another attempt at giving the idiot depth with the demon following him around. Idiot person in house attributes survival of fire to priest's blessing earlier.
--End--

And thus, we have gone through the wonderful world of idiocy and come back alive. I don't think I'm going to watch the other 2 episodes; I can't risk burning all my brain cells to death with the stupid.

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Clicky The Link!

If you click the link it will give me money in a game that I'm trying.

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Great, another death prophecy?

"Guardian of Earth Aurora" has a message for us:

This is a message from the Guardian of Earth Aurora.

06/13/08

There will be a huge earthquake that will take place in July 08 that will hit the South Eastern part of Asia and will be felt all over the world. The earthquake will affect China with the most damage and the Eastern Pacific Islands will see tidal waves like none before. This earthquake will be the biggest and most disastrous earthquake seen yet by modern man. It will cause more damage then the previous earthquake in China, May 08 or any other one before.

The damage from this earth shattering experience will have an unforeseen outcome that will cause uncertainty for all. This will accelerate the falling economy to the collapse. China’s economy will be the first to suffer but will effect the rest of the world. This will cause confusion and suffering for all and mass panic. The USA will fall to rubble.

You will be happy to know me. I am a Prophetess. I am the Guardian of Earth. My name is Aurora and I am here for one specific reason. To start a “New Way” a new society that will clear the lies and expose the Truth. You will have all the answers.

There is a storm coming. You must be ready.

The Guardian
Aurora

Basically, everybody is fucked in July and there's nothing we can do about it. Funny, the guardian of earth makes no claims to be able to save those who believe.
There's a bunch of weird almost-word salad afterwards that doesn't make much sense, mostly in the part where it talks about the new society thing. But the important thing is, we need to remember in August this so that we can laugh at them.

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Spore Creature Creator

Yeah, yeah, I know, you all expect me to make a ferret like critter in the Creature Creator, right? Well, I'm not going to. Mostly because I'm having trouble doing so. But I'm not doing it, and that's final! Unless, of course, I happen to figure it out. In the meantime, I've made these.

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Really Really Late Poll #5

It's unanimous, everybody who voted has read a work of Darwin... because only one did.

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89th Skeptic's Circle

Skeptic's Circle. GO! Now! If you don't, I reserve the right to whack you with the Ancient Quarterstaff of Broken Lightbulbs(TM)

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I have free time? OMFSMWTFBBQ!

Because I have a bit of free time....
Look at this. Then think about it for a second.





Done?
Okay, now scream the Khornate battle cry, because it fits both gods.

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No Nukes! No Nukes! We Yet Live!

The previous prediction that nuclear war would happen by Thursday, June 12, 2008 was wrong; it's passed that here in TX (state of origin of the prophecy) so laugh your ass off at Yisrayl Hawkins.

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Holy Text Dissections: Genesis 7

Sorry I haven't been posting quite as much lately, been a bit busy. Before I head to San Antonio tommorow, God kills people today.

7 Then the LORD said to Noah, "Enter the ark, you and all your household, for I have seen that you alone are righteous before Me in this generation. 2 You are to take with you seven pairs, a male and its female, of all clean animals, and two of the animals that are not clean, a male and its female, 3 and seven pairs, male and female, of the birds of the sky-in order to keep offspring alive on the face of the whole earth.

Ummm.... God, why are you contradicting yourself again? Now you say 7 pairs of clean animals and 2 of unclean animals (would that be 1 or 2 pairs? it doesn't say very clearly), and before you said just a pair of everything.

4 Seven days from now I will make it rain on the earth 40 days and 40 nights, and I will wipe off the face of the earth every living thing I have made." 5 And Noah did everything the LORD commanded him to do.

God, seriously, stop being stupid and self contradictory. You just ordered him to keep things alive; there will still be your creations on earth.

6 Noah was 600 years old when the deluge came, and water covered the earth.

God, your quality has really deteriorated over time. We only live around 80 years now, and a little while ago, we lived only 30 years; we only got to where we are now because God was great enough to give us all those nice Satanic technological thingies.

7 So Noah, his sons, his wife, and his sons' wives entered the ark because of the waters of the deluge. 8 From the clean animals, unclean animals, birds, and every creature that crawls on the ground, 9 two of each, male and female, entered the ark with Noah, just as God had commanded him. 10 Seven days later the waters of the deluge came on the earth.

1: He's saying AGAIN that it's 2 of each, but he just had this big thing about 7 pairs of the clean ones.
2: Wait, they enter because of the deluge, but the deluge happens 7 days later? Timeline is screwy here.
3: Insert sex joke here.

11 In the six hundredth year of Noah's life, in the second month, on the seventeenth day of the month, on that day all the sources of the watery depths burst open, the floodgates of the sky were opened, 12 and the rain feel on the earth 40 days and 40 nights.

Can it really rain that long? Seems the slightest bit, uh, impossible.

13 On that same day Noah along with his sons Shem, Ham, and Japheth, Noah's wife, and his three sons' wives entered the ark with him.

The timeline is screwing up even more. Stop making paradoxes God, the universe will explode!

14 They entered it with all the wildlife according to their kinds, all livestock according to their kinds, every creature that crawls on the earth according to its kind, all birds, every fowl, and everything with wings according to their kinds.

Now it's every animal? Dammit God, I told you not to cause a fucking-oh shi-*universe explodes from paradox overdose*
*radio static*
-hear me? I think we got the universe back to norm-you can hear me? Good, good. On with the show... as long as he stops the paradoxes.

15 Two of all flesh that has the breath of life in it entered the ark with Noah.

*attempts to prevent a second universe explosion*

16 Those that entered, male and female of all flesh, entered just as God had commanded him. Then the LORD shut him in.

That's not very safe God, he could starve to death in there! And he really should have, if he didn't eat some of those tasty sheep/cows/ostriches/snails/lions/T-rexes.

17 The deluge continued 40 days on the earth; the waters incresed and lifted up the ark so that it rose above the earth. 18 The waters surged and increased greatly on the earth, and the ark floated on the surface of the water. 19 Then the waters surged even higher on the earth, and all the high mountains under the whole sky were covered.

Even Everest? Damn, that's a lot of water.

20 The mountains were covered as the waters surged above them more than 20 feet. 21 All flesh perished-creatures that crawl on the earth, birds, livestock, wildlife, and all creatures that swarm on the earth, as well as all mankind. 22 Everything with the breath of the spirit of life in its nostrils-everything on dry land died. 23 He wiped out every living thing that was on the surface of the ground, from mankind to livestock, to creatures that crawl, to the birds of the sky, and they were wiped off the earth. Only Noah was left, and those that were with him in the ark. And the water surged on the earth 150 days.

*MK voice* Fatality!

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Nuclear War By Next Thursday, People!

Why must you idiots make my state look bad? Some idiot predicts nuclear war by next Thursday. June 12, 2008; remember that day, people! On the thirteenth, remember to laugh your ass off at him.

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Kawase Takara Foot Patches: Archive

All posts covering Kawase Takara foot patches so far are listed here.
Kawase Takara Foot Patches: Part 1
Part 2

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Kawase Takara Foot Patches: Part 1

I finally have a decent woo to post about! Though I think Orac might have already covered it, but it was spamvertised here. It's.... Kawase Takara™ foot patches!

This woo is, according to the front page, the "original detoxifying patch" and is "designed to revitalize the body, enhance blood circulation, strengthen the immune system, improve the quality of sleep and promote better health." It has natural ingredients and negative ions, is placed on acupuncture points, used to cure such varied things as arthritis, headaches, insomnia, menstrual pain, and more! It was made by Dr. Kawase Itsuko, who was awarded the "Best Invention and New Technology-the highest award in Japan, in recognition of her creative and scientific contribution to mankind." Best of all, one box is only $29.95!

Let's check out the first section, "The Patch".

Eastern medical theory believes that the accumulation of toxins in the human body brings about diseases. As an effective detoxifier, Kawase Takara™ absorbs the unwanted toxins from our blood.

I thought Eastern medical theory said that illness was caused by blockages of qi?

The liquid gathered in Kawase Takara™ is actually the unwanted lymph fluid from the body. Getting rid of this fluid helps normalize blood circulation and improve our immune system.

Quick scanning of the Wikipedia article doesn't say that the lymph system needs any help in removing wastes.

The first step towards treating an illness is enhancing the immune system. In other words, the body must reach a balance between the excretion of toxins and the absorption of nutrients. It takes a long time for the absorption of nutrients to happen at a normal metabolic rate. If this is the case, then why not consider a detoxification method that is based on direct excretion that can increase the metabolic rate and shorten the time of recovery?

I have a feeling none of this is actually based in reality, except that nutrients are absorbed.

We have the liver, kidney, lung, and skin as the four main excretion organs. They take in what we need and at the same time dispose of what we do not need. If these organs function efficiently, health can be maintained. Otherwise, toxins start accumulating in the body and could cause illness. Kawase Takara™ has been referred to as the "5th organ" for excretion purposes to accelerate the detoxification process.

1: Humans do, in fact, have intestines.

2: I haven't heard of the liver being an excretory organ.

3: Excreting just 1 thing (carbon dioxide) doesn't really make the lungs a major
excretory organ.

4: Excretory organs aren't exactly known for taking in what we need. The kidney does not, to my knowledge, digest anything, does it?

5: Horribly defined "toxins". The excretory organs don't need help getting rid of them.

6: An organ is, according to Dictionary.com, is "A grouping of tissues into a distinct structure, as a heart or kidney in animals or a leaf or stamen in plants, that performs a specialized task." It's not a living thing, it isn't made of tissues.

That's 6 things wrong with just one paragraph. If I looked closely, I could probably find more. Not good for your foot pads!

Patience is required to see results. Just as it took time to accumulate toxins in the body, time is required to remove them. The medical field has proven that after Kawase Takara™ has been applied for about 30 days, fewer toxins will be left for extraction. Experience has shown that pain could be relieved when the detoxifier turns to a lighter color, or becomes drier and less foul. All these show that Kawase Takara™ has performed its function of detoxification by absorbing toxins that have accumulated in the human body.

I have a feeling that the "medical field" in this case consists solely of doctors of traditional Eastern medicine. "Experience" probably means anecdotes, and are therefore useless.

These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration.

This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.

Do Not Use if Allergic to Shellfish.

They haven't been evaluated by the FDA. Not good for them.

The statement that it isn't intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent disease is obviously false, based on the statements on the website.

Lastly, what the hell do shellfish have to do with anything?

Congrats, Kawase Takara makers: Your foot patch is completely and totally worthless.

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Toxins From Your Feet

I believe Orac has some posts on a similar or possibly exactly this topic. While randomly watching TV, I found a commercial for.... Kinoki Japanese detox foot pads! And remember, this has to be natural. According to the commercial, "just like a tree draws energy in and toxins down its trunk, your body works the same way" and it "works on Japanese reflexology". They have everything, footpads that slowly get lighter over however long use, graphs that are utterly useless due to lacking any numeric labels on the Y axis (and they don't stay up long enough to tell that if you don't have it recorded), and claims of general body health. According to them, it gets chemicals, heavy metals, and toxins out of you. You can get a weeks worth for only 20 bucks, folks, and if you call now, you get an extra weeks supply and any more you want for just the shipping and handling! What a great deal! Especially considering that they give you your money back if you don't see results the first time you use it. What's not to love?

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Holy Text Dissections: Genesis 6

God reveals his plans for mass murder!

6 When mankind began to multiply on the earth and daughters were born to them, 2 the sons of God saw that the daughters of man were beautiful, and they took any they chose as wives for themselves.

OMFSM MISOGYNY! The women had no choice in being married did they?

3 And the LORD said, "My Spirit will no remain with mankind forever, because they are corrupt. Their days will be 120 years."

.....why? If you're gonna commit mass murder, why wait?

4 The Nephilim were on the earth both in those days and afterwards, when the sons of God came to the daughters of man, who bore children to them. They were the powerful men of old, the famous men.

Okay. Here's what I think is the only mention of Nephilim in the bible. It doesn't say much. STOP MAKING UP CONSPIRACY THEORIES ABOUT THEM FUNDIES!

5 When the LORD saw that man's wickedness was widespread on the earth and that every scheme his mind thought of was nothing but evil all the time, 6 the LORD regretted that He had made man on earth, and He was grieved in His heart.

Omniscience is overrated I guess, must not include the future.

7 Then the LORD said, "I will wipe off the face of the earth: man, whom I created, together with the animals, creatures that crawl, and birds of the sky-for I regret that I made them." 8 Noah, however, found favor in the eyes of the LORD.

So, you're going to wipe them off the face of the earth AND spare some? Isn't that kind of contradictory?

9 These are the family records of Noah. Noah was a righteous man, blameless among his contemporaries; Noah walked with God. 10 And Noah fathered three sons: Shem, Ham, and Japheth.

Wait, I thought all the people were evil sinners. How is Noah not?

11 Now the earth was corrupt in God's sight, and the earth was filled with violence. 12 God saw how corrupt the earth was, for all flesh had corrupted its way on the earth.

What, and God doesn't want violence? I thought he was going to put everyone in the most likely violent torture of Hell if they don't believe in him?

13 Then God said to Noah, "I have decided to put an end to all flesh, for the earth is filled with violence because of them; therefore I am going to destroy them along with the earth.

1: Stop repeating your damn self. 2: The earth is still here, dumbass!

14 "Make yourself an ark of gofer wood. Make rooms in the ark, and cover it with pitch inside and outside. 15 this is how you are to make it: The ark will be 450 feet long, 75 feet wide, and 45 feet high. 16 You are to make a roof, finishing the sides of the ark to within 18 inches of the roof. You are to put a door in the side of the ark. Make it with lower, middle, and upper decks.

Not only does he not know how to make a fucking boat, God tells him to make a boat that couldn't possibly fit a pair of every species of animal and 7 pairs of every clean animal.

17 "Understand that I am bringing a deluge-floodwaters on the earth to destroy all flesh under heaven with the breath of life in it. Everything on the earth will die.

God's kill count, if you don't count every death as God's fault for making death exist: Over 99% of the world's population of animals and people.

18 But I will establish My covenant with you, and you will enter the ark with your sons, your wife, and your sons' wives. 19 You are also to bring into the ark two of every living thing of all flesh, male and female, to keep them alive with you.

God later adjusts this order, for reasons unknown. Apparently we need more clean than unclean animals and it took him a bit to realize it.

20 Two of everything-from the birds according to their kinds, from the livestock according to their kinds, and from every animal that crawls on the ground according to its kind-will come to you so that you can keep them alive.

Anyone else notice that God repeats himself way too much for this to even resemble decent literature that doesn't bore you out of your fucking mind?

21 Take with you ever kind of food that is eaten; gather it as food for you and for them."

Take extra cows and a lot of grass, should be fine. Also, remember to feed the mosquitos.

22 And Noah did this. He did everything that God commanded him to do.

Then God did reveal that he had caught it on tape, and thus was Noah Punk'd.

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Holy Text Dissections: Genesis 5

Impossibly old people. O.o

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88th Skeptics Circle

Skeptic's Circle. Go see it. NOW!

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Yay! Finals are done!

It's summertime now, so I can start posting more again! Yay!

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